How AWARE would you say you are, right in this moment, of your NEED of GOD? In general, would you say you have a pervasive awareness of your needfulness, or not so much? This has been on my mind for many years, especially as I live in the aftermath of some of my “not so great moments” in life.
The thing is, I’m certain as I read the Bible, that my need of God is comprehensive, whatever my awareness. If I slip into the template Jesus established when He walked the earth, I would do NOTHING of my own will or in my own power. The idea is that God is supplying every need 24/7. You can’t be more dependent than that.
But the truth is, I’ve scooted through moments or days or even whole seasons of life dangerously oblivious as I’ve lived in my own strength. “I got this!” (famous last words). It’s been to my detriment (and sometimes to those around me) to allow my own ability or competence or self-discipline to come to bear. When I choose to forget the pervasiveness of my need of God, I exit the safety of His care, let alone His power. “Shift my awareness of my need of you, God!”
How needful was King David as he lounged on his rooftop with Bathsheba in his sites? How needful was Eve when she applied her own reasoning in response to the serpent’s challenge to her in Eden? How needful was Abraham when he took Sarah’s advise so that they might hurry along the arrival of the promised child? How needful was Peter the Apostle, when he passionately insisted his devotion to Jesus could never waver?
Does it really matter that I acknowledge my need of God and practice dependance rather than allowing my own competence to come to bear? I have woken from too many self imposed slumbers to find myself having drifted a very long way from the company of God. Those scenarios happened one “I could do this in my sleep” day at a time. All the while the full breadth of my need remained. God has been very merciful to remind me time and again: both the ordinary and extraordinary days are laden with land-mines. I don’t want to navigate either in my flesh.
Lord, shift my awareness of my comprehensive need of You, and then bolt me to that bit of ground. May both the ordinary and extraordinary moments of today be lived out under the sway of Your Spirit. It matters more than I know.
~for further reflection~
Psalm 40:16-17; 139:7-10,
John 5:30; 8:28,